Friday, October 24, 2008

A perfect heart

Brooklyn had her cardiologist appointment on Wednesday. The doctor listened to her heart for quite a while, then did an ECHO. Then he told us that the hole in Brooklyn's heart (a ventricular septal defect) had completely closed! He said that she had "a perfect heart" now! And she no longer needs to see the cardiologist! I just wanted to hug him. It is so wonderful to know that something that has caused us a lot of worry is ALL BETTER. I hope the same will happen with her airway issues and her reflux in the near future too.

Brooklyn weighed 12 pounds, 13 ounces on the scale at the cardiologist's office. Not as bad as the 12 pounds, 7 ounces she weighed the day before on the gastroenterologist's scale, but still some weight loss. Sigh.

She got her Synagis shot right after we saw her cardiologist. Her cardiologist is her only specialist that we get to see here in our hometown instead of driving to Dallas. They come to our pediatrician's office once a month to see their patients here, which is nice. Dr. A's nurse gave Brooklyn the Synagis shot, and she did really well. She cried, but stopped as soon as I picked her up. Dr. A is having a flu shot clinic tomorrow and I am supposed to take Brooklyn to get a flu shot then. She has to get the flu shot twice and will get Synagis shots every month throughout RSV season.

We went to visit Beth, our wonderful lactation consultant, after we got done at the doctor's office. It was so good to see her, since it had been about three months. I just love her! She has been such a great source of support since Brooklyn was born. I always feel so relaxed as soon as I walk through her door. Not only did she help me get my newborn baby to eat and gain weight (which I promise you was no small feat), she was my shoulder to cry on for the first few months of Brooklyn's life. She always comforted me, understood me, hugged on me, and told me that everything I was feeling was normal and okay. She called my OB when Brooklyn was about 7 weeks old and got me an appointment to see her because I was so depressed. I felt like I was going to die. I didn't think I could do this anymore. I thought that there was no way I could love my baby enough or be thankful enough for her. I wasn't sleeping because I thought that God was going to punish me by taking Brooklyn from me during the night. I felt like the worst mother in the world and I thought that my baby would be better off without me around. And I couldn't tell anyone but Beth. That's when my OB put me on medication for PPD. Beth was the only person that I could talk to about the whole ordeal. She will always mean so much to me for being there through all of that, and I can never thank her enough!

Anyway, Brooklyn and I hung out with Beth for a couple of hours. Oh, and Brooklyn weighed 12 pounds, 12 ounces on her scale. A mommy with a 12-day-old baby came in and I got to talk to her some. She was crying and was really overwhelmed and exhausted. It made me realize how far Brooklyn and I have come. Yes, I still feel overwhelmed and inadequate and all of that at times...but I don't feel the way that I did when Brooklyn was 12 days old. Overall, things are much better now because I don't constantly feel like there is no way that I can do this parenting thing. It made me kind of proud to realize that Brooklyn and I are both making progress.

8 comments:

Jonathan and Tara said...

Congratulations on the good news about her heart! And thank you for being brave and sharing about your PPD. I had it pretty bad too, and I was so embarrassed for a long time to tell anyone. Now I can talk about it openly because I feel like it was a long time ago- but I am so glad that I had honest friends and bloggers before me so that I recognized it and got treatment. I hope that someone can be helped by reading what you just wrote.

Tara @ www.twolinesonastick.com

And Baby Makes Three said...

YEAH Brooklyn!!!! One doctor checked off the list!!! What a relief....and Amanda, you are doing an AWESOME job raising her...it's not easy being a mommy to a not-so-healthy baby ( :

And Baby Makes Three said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Hope said...

Yay Brooklyn! I'm so thrilled her heart is perfect! I know you needed some good news.

edie & ella said...

That's great news...one specialist down 243 to go....I bet it feels like that many sometimes!!! You are such a great mommy!!! SAM

Cibele said...

Thank God for her perfect little heart!!!!! I am so happy. You are a great mother my friend!

Liz said...

Isn't it awesome to be able to see that 12 day old baby/mommy & realize how far you've come?! It's always such an encouragement to me, as a mom, to see people with littler ones than my own and to remember those days, relish in the memories, and then joyfully look at my (older) kids and realize that they've really grown up & I'm doing OK as their mom. Love ya girl!

L.G. Reeves said...

go brooklyn!!!!! proud of both of you.!!!

that is is awsome news about the hole, o....what hole, did you say hole, aint got one!!!!!!!!!!

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