The countdown is on. Just hours until I have to leave my sweet baby and return to working life.
It's been 11 weeks and 6 days since I gave birth to my little girl. It's gone by so quickly. I am no longer counting down months, weeks, or days until I have to become a working mom...it's down to hours. 13 hours, to be exact.
I am not handling this very well.
You would think I would be out of tears after this past week, but I'm not. I feel like such an inadequate mother. I feel so awful for having to leave her. I almost feel like I am having to give her away. I caress her face, I stroke her fuzzy hair, sing to her. I hold her close and kiss her forehead, her soft chubby cheeks, her tiny lips, her long, graceful fingers. I am trying to memorize everything about her, because I feel like I am about to miss out on so much. I wonder if she will miss me like I will miss her.
I am absolutely dreading tomorrow morning. I hope my days at work fly by, so I can come back home to her again.