Thursday, August 28, 2008

I've got my fingers and toes crossed

I just got a call from Dr. A, Brooklyn's pediatrician. I've been playing phone tag and waiting for calls from both him and Dr. G2 (the pulmonologist) all week. Dr. A said that Dr. G2 has studied Brooklyn's upper GI films and is "concerned that there may be a vascular ring." Apparently, the upper GI x-rays are not the greatest quality, and no one can really tell for sure.

We have Brooklyn's video swallow study tomorrow morning in Dallas. Both doctors believe that this will be able to show whether or not she has a vascular ring. I hope it really does tell them, one way or the other. We are so tired of putting our baby through all of these tests and procedures and not getting any answers.

Dr. A also said that "We didn't get many answers from the sleep study because it wasn't an ideal study." Um. Yeah, I could have told you that. I wonder what the report says...I told Dr. A that the sleep study was a nightmare, and he said, "Yeah, that's what I heard."

So. Test tomorrow. I hope, hope, HOPE we get some answers from it. Please, just someone tell me what is wrong with my sweet baby and tell us what we can do to fix it. That's all I want.

And other unrelated frustrations of the day....
1.) I had my annual check up with my OB/GYN today. I weigh nearly 5 pounds more than I did at my 6 week postpartum visit (4 months ago). Lovely.
2.)The human resources lady has not called me back (again) and I don't know what to do. We now have to go to Dallas next Tuesday to see the pediatric gastroenterologist. It will be almost completely without pay as I have one hour of vacation and sick time now.
3.) I got into a hurry and left the house this morning without kissing Brooklyn and telling her goodbye and that I love her. This is the first time I have ever done that. I feel so guilty about it. What a horrible thing for a mommy to do. I almost turned my car around and went back when I realized it, but I was already running 15 minutes late. I should have just gone back. I am so sad about it.


Hope said...

I hope you get some answers, really I do. I had to giggle about the kissing Brooklyn goodbye thing. You are such a great Mommy. You have been through so much. You need to do something nice for yourself before you get burnt out and really depressed. The great news is that she WILL outgrow this! Keep reminding yourself that this is temporary! You are doing an amazing job.

Kate said...

You must be so stressed! I know they will find an answer to all of this soon. Hang in there!!

Momma Mary said...

I'm keeping you in my prayers!! I prayed extra hard yesterday. Hopefully the doctors will be able to figure it out soon.

Don't worry about leaving and not saying you love her. She knows. :) She really really does.


Cibele said...

I hope you get the answers tomorrow. I've done the same thing, she knows how much you love her, you are a great mom!

Carrie27 said...

Don't worry about the weight, you are under huge amounts of stress right now.

Good luck with the test tomorrow, I hope it is quick and that you get some answers instead of putting Brooklyn through another horrible test for nothing. There has to be answers out there for her, there just does.

Jennifer said...

Good luck tomorrow! I think feeling guilty goes along with mommyhood. Sometimes I have to leave in the morning without a kiss goodbye just because she's crying so hard about me leaving. It's awful and I have to call Kevin (he lives in a different city) just to make myself feel better about leaving. It will get better and you are doing great! I wish you lived in Houston and we could do something fun together. With our daughters of course since we'd both just talk about them the whole time anyway :P

And Baby Makes Three said...

I left a few weeks ago in a hurry w/o kissing Claire and I felt so bad all day long...when I got home that night and ran to her she had the biggest, wet smile on her face which made ME feel better...I hope you get some answers this weekend!

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